It's The Most Wonderful Time Of Year....

As long as you aren't depressed. (although my favourite Christmas song just came on my player and I'm waiting for all the customers to leave so I can unpause it and play it really loud).

Anyways this is going to be short and unsweet. I hate stress. I hate money. I hate Christmas.  I'm surprised Krampus hasn't come these past two years instead of Santa. Yes I do still believe in Santa. 🎄
I am sick and tired of the string of bad luck that has been following me since what happened at the tool store. It is just one thing after another. after another. I believed in Karma before. Bad karma. Good I rarely saw. Bad karma definitely happens. I am the living proof of that. But this bad karma is going to break me. I am at my wits end. I cannot take much more. I don't have anyone to talk to about what is going on. Sorry. That's a lie. There is a couple people I could talk to, except that I am scared to talk to them. I'm not the type of petson to ask for help or to share what is going on with me. Which is how I got into this whole mess in the first place.

I seriously need something good to happen in my life soon.

Grinch Time

This  is going to be a bit of a rant. I completely understand if you want to skip this post all together as it is not going to be one of the greatest moods. You can call me a Grinch but it is what it is.

I do not like Christmas. As I have grown up, my hatred for Christmas has grown also. I know that some of it stems from childhood. Dad being a trucker, was not always home for Christmas. But a lot of it stems from the commercialization of the holiday. I do not understand the purpose of celebrating a holiday where a lot of people go into debt trying to get everything that everybody wants. I know that I am guilty of doing it in the past, which is a partial reason as to why I am in the financial hardship that I am in currently. It seems that no one celebrates the joy of coming together with family and celebrating. It has become all about the presents. For example, I was appalled when one of my nephews last year stated that, “He only got….” I love my nephew, but to complain about the amount of presents that you got does not show the true meaning of Christmas. Yes it is a holiday to celebrate Jesus’ birth. But I think of it more as a time for everyone to come together and spend time with your family. The same nephew last year also made his father very upset as he wanted to spend time at Nana’s (my Mom’s) house playing with me instead of going with the rest of his family (dad, stepmom, and siblings) to visit his stepmoms mother.
It is not uncommon for me to go into a deep depression during December. Unfortunately it started a little earlier this year. Pretending to be cheerful through this time of year is very tiring at times. This year we get to include the joy of trying to move right before Christmas. We had decided late last week that we would just wait it out until the house got sold. But with the circumstances that arose last night, the search has been reinstated. I had even set up our tree.
There won’t be any presents underneath it. It is just to have a bit of a festive feel to the house.
Well that is all I have for now. Hopefully the next time I post it will include some good news about our living situation.